About Us


The Open Road Project exists to spread kindness and meet the needs of strangers. We travel in a 1979 GMC Vanguard named Lily. These are our stories.

Friday, May 25, 2012

Pinchy


Once upon a time, four adventurous adventurers were on an adventure. Their travels brought them to a Lobster Shoppe, said to be the best shoppe in all the world. Since they were in the Land of the Lobster, or should I say, the Island of the Lobster, it was quite necessary to have the cultural experience of cracking open such a crustacean and enjoy the fresh ocean flavour.

Although they had not yet consumed breakfast, nor had hardly woken from their slumber from the previous night, there was one thing they had yet to accomplish before they left the island: to suckle on the delicious nectar and soft meat of an Atlantic lobster.

As they entered the shop, they were greeted by a lovely shopkeeper and a 19 pound MONSTER stuffed lobster, said to be the grandfather of all Atlantic lobsters. This beast had ruled the Atlantic since prehistoric times and had now found a home on the wall, after losing a week long battle with the most skilled fisherman in all the land in the early 18th century.

Getting back to the story, the four asked for the largest lobster that the Atlantic was currently offering. The shopkeeps eyes widened and her expression was matched with four faces that meant business.

She went into the back room and after what sounded like a struggle, she opened the door and presented them with Pinchy.  This Ferrari red sea dweller was the alpha male in direct lineage with the monster from the wall, and this pleased the adventurers.

They plopped him down on the table in their epic vehicle of recreation and hauled out the tool box.

Within minutes, Pinchy’s limbs were strewn about and his innards spread across the table. Each man wielded a different instrument be it scissors, a hammer or a screwdriver. With each crack of the shell, savory juices squirted in every direction. As the adventurers chomped into the fresh flesh, they discovered Pinchy’s last meal in his stomach, and the stench proved that digestion was in process upon the time capture. The meaty claws and tail provided the four with enough nourishment to last them a week, and they were very satisfied.

Not a piece of meat was wasted, and in the end, the torso of Pinchy was the only part left in tact. After an intensive clean up of the juices and cracked shell strewn about the vehicle, it was time to give Pinchy a proper burial.

As the four men left the Island of the Lobster, they hucked his remains over the largest bridge in the world and into the ocean where he once dwelled. To this day, his remains make up a part of each Atlantic Lobster and his lineage and legacy remains.

2 comments:

  1. I guess it would be more true to say that I have "keenly perused" the first 25 posts available on page one, more than "read" them. In retrospect I should not have started such a project after midnight and really, I retained very little... but this one jumped out in my mind. Love it. I hope that with a little more time kicking around camp with you I will get to hear some of these stories in person!

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    1. Oh for sure! Thanks for the comment, lots of stories to come over the summer!

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